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Friday 16 October 2009

Seven Ugly Truths of being a 22-year-old girl

1) On work:
Once you are 22 your parents, grandparents, aunties so on and so forth tell you that you must begin to feel more responsible. All of a sudden, you are pushed into working and before you realise work becomes second priority after yourself. Sometimes, you get so frustrated that you begin grumbling to absolute strangers about a bad day at work. The best part is that you believe and behave like you’ve climbed Mount Calvary while everyone knows it is “just an ant hill” that you are struggling to cross. Soon someone will whisper… I am sorry boss you still gotta digest this fact…. Work is just the beginning.
2) Busy bee:
You suddenly become Miss Busy Bee. You want to have fun, but work won’t allow. You try to juggle, but multi-tasking you realise, is not your cup of tea. Everyone hates you for this “busy bee” attitude. Your friends taunt you time and again, your siblings whine about how you have time for friends and work and not for them, your parents grumble about how you have shoved away of all the household responsibilities. This is life darling and nobody is going to understand. Often, if you do manage to get time out, you rather prefer to spend it alone over a book or movie… (Ahaan… I think you now enjoy being busy for the world…really who cares if I am happy).
3) Pep talk from Mommy dearest: BEWARE
This is danger zone. You need to beware especially if the pep talk comes from your mom. Now, that you are 22, she assumes you are in the cradle of marriage. Every time you do anything wrong she is sure to relate it to post marriage situations. For eg. You get up late... mom comes to you… get up sweetheart… what will your in-laws and husband say…. They’ll say that your mom hasn’t even taught you to be up early. Woah… this is not even related but you know the mothers. “When you get married…when you have kids…how to deal with your in-laws”…is how the mommies begin their sentences on most occasions and that too when you haven’t come close to finding yourself prospective in-laws and husbands.
4) Envy:
Girls who are working in offices are envious of girls who have taken to studying instead and vice-versa. It is worst when such two girls are friends because they always end up comparing each others lives and how fortunate the other is. This in reality is envy x envy = envy square. No one is satisfied and “Miss envy” keeps growing and multiplying and trust me “envy” is emotionally draining.
5) Boredom and loneliness
At 22, nothing is going to be or feel like college or school. Lets hang out and Lets chill are words that are best for the bin.
And well… since this is the phase of all work and no play, monotony is bound to get the better of dull Jack. Often, you’d realise that none of your friends have time to spare for you, probably cause they all have suddenly learn to reckon with what I call “their responsibilities.” Sometimes, you just want to talk to someone and you begin dialing numbers of old friends, if you are lucky one of them will pick up, if you aren’t you can sit back and remember the good times you had with you Ex (poor you). If you have a best friend, its worst. You keep calling them until they pick up. After over 50 missed calls, your friend will get back to you saying… “listen get yourself a boyfriend and stop harrowing me.” You get upset with your friend and promise to never call him/her up until your ego quells and you finally give in. Then, you guys behave like nothing happened.
6) Boasting
Hmm… you know you are getting old, so all you have got to do is to boast about the good old days. How much I partied? How much I drank…uff the hangover…simply amazing yaar? And my resemblance to a chimney…. Mindblowing?
For, all you know, amidst all the work all the fun has dissipated. So all you have left is to boast about the good old days. And, for those unfortunate 22-year-olds, who’ve not gone beyond fine wine and dine yet, serves you right. :P Wake up…. Wake up
7) For all the single 22s out there… this one is for you:
If you are 22 and still single, believe me, you are going to be facing some tough time out there. Let me touch upon two most relevant issues:
The Callers: Boys from the past, with whom you’ve least interacted while still in your teens or whom you rather chose to keep an arms distance from, may suddenly start chasing you like hounds. Maybe they see you on Facebook or probably on Orkut… they see your relationship status and realise that you are single. And wow… in no time they’d be running for you telling you how much they loved you in school or college blah blah or how happy you’d have been if you would have been with them instead of being with that “old hag” who left you after washing dirty linen in public.
Probably, they are single and desperate and are expecting similar emotional crap from the opposite sex or May be they really love you and it is high time you figured it out.
What to do now? Safest bet: You are 22 and expected to be wise, learn to handle such situations with utmost maturity or simply play with your relationship status on networking sites. They’ll never figure out.
The Calling: Honestly, nobody cares if you want to be in a relationship or not, but everyone is out there to fix you with someone else. You know such people have this strange sense of what I’d explain as “The Calling,” where they believe that they are God-sent messengers of love and know who you really look good with and all that jazz….
If you talk to other singles of your age or slightly beyond, your friends love to assume that you are upto something fishy. There is incessant teasing and gossip that is bound to happen in the process (please don’t be disheartened). You are going to be the butt of all jokes and uncessary couple-pairing until you find yourself a guy. Worst case is if you happen to fall in love with the person you’ve been teased with, cause your friends and folks are not going to spare themselves the credit. Aww.. look at them, so cute na… you know I brought them together. Aghhhh!!

Keep Smiling and keep dreaming
Jane

Sunday 28 June 2009

Why I will miss MJ?

I was 8-years-old i.e. 1995 when I was first introduced to Michael Jackson. Not that he did not exist before that (infact he was at his prime in '95), but, I simply never found any of his songs appealing until then.
However, my youngest brother, who was hardly two-years-old at the time, took some great liking to his moves. He loved MJ so much that he got my dad buy video cassettes of the making of some of his biggest music videos. So we had the making of Thriller, Moonwalker, Beat it, Bad, Black or White, Man in the mirror and Remember the Time... in less than few weeks in our house and running on our TV like 24/7.
Often, since we had nothing interesting to do, we tagged along on with him, lying on the bed, endlessly watching MJ sing and dance. Thriller for that matter was interesting, it was like watching a Horror Movie.... so we got hooked to it. Within months, the whole family became an MJ fan.... quite late in the day, but, still we did. Our rooms were full with his posters and both my brothers and I would dance like crazy to his songs, miming gibberish (we never learnt the lyrics).
I remember my brother played MJ and me Naomi Cambell... and we danced to remember the time. Over the years, I started respecting his music, with Heal the World, We are the World, You are not alone and Music and Me being my all time favourites.
MJ had a cynical side to him, but his music balanced the uneven. And though we all thought he had gone crazy and detested his obsession for his skin colour, we could never really manage to have a strong opinion about him. For us he was MJ, flawlessly the best the pop industry had ever seen. I love you MJ... your music has made my childhood memories extra-special...RIP

Wednesday 20 May 2009

Walking Mumbai's Red-light



It is 11pm. We’ve just had dinner at CafĂ© Noorani near Heera Panna and are now making headway to one of the city’s most menacing locales. Arzai (name changed) is with us. He has promised us a slice of Mumbai’s dark side. I am not keen about the visit, in fact I am very sceptical, not because I am not well-protected, but because the red-light is not the most fascinating place to be. When you see people of the same sexes garishly displaying their bodies as if to be objectified only, a bag of mixed emotions surface. There is anger, there is sympathy, there is hatred or there is either absolute ignorance.
We have decided to watch the red-light from inside the car. It is said that the red-light just gets brighter post 9pm and business is at its peak. We first pass by Falkland Road. The narrow pathway greets you with an unpleasant stench and you don’t know from where it is coming. But the smell reeks of filthy sex, small money, poor women and hungry men.
The stench is augmented by the restaurants, which have their pantries outside. Sweaty men are cooking chicken tikkas and naan for the customers who want to have full of everything today (both sex and food). Falkland Road is also lined with three cinema halls of which I remember Roshan Cinema. Right now it is screening “Golden Girl”- A rated.
On either side of the road, there are small buildings each compartmentalised into small rooms. The doors of the ground-floors are opened while the top floors have iron cages, just like the one you find in elevators.
Interestingly, these cages were built in the mid-1900s on the orders of the police. Girls in the red-light would be dragged or molested by pushy men. At the time, prostitution was at its peek, and men would literally line the doors for their turn. The cages were built on the ground and top floors to ensure that these girls remain within their safe havens and not loiter around in the “tolerated areas” and become victims of notoriety. These cages though of not much use today, still stand rusted but strong in these partially dilapidated buildings.
The women here are freely moving for customers. They are approaching men, calling out to them, making sleazy gestures. Most are dressed awkwardly in tight-fitting clothes, lining their stomachs which have developed a bubble with time. If they are wearing sarees, you wouldn’t be surprised if it doesn’t cover the upper-half of the body. Plunging necklines, red lipstick and heavily powdered – these women are nothing close to being deceptive prostitutes. It is a mix breed, from ages 16 to 60 to limitless frontiers, from the east (Bengal, Bangladesh, Assamese) west (Gujarat), north (Nepalese) and south (Tamilians and Kannadigas).
You know they are commercial sex workers and they have no reservations about it. They flaunt it, regardless of any appreciation. They are the cheapest of the lot (Rs 50 to Rs 500) and they have no qualms about it.
Enter Foras Road, which is on the other side of Falkland Road, and I feel like I have approached a dead end. It is nothing like Falkland Road. Prostitution is close to redundancy here and cane workers and tall buildings line the road instead. However, few metres ahead, the lanes of Kamathipura speak the same language of Brothels. Kamathipura is split into some 14 lanes, each unique with its own story to tell. Some of these however bear the footprints of residential homes today, as several brothels have now shifted base.
The ride was interesting, but Arzai tells us that there is more to come…he speaks of Congress House. Before I begin, let me give you a briefer. Congress House is located in one of the bylanes of Lamington Road near the Grant Road police station.

Once a beehive of India’s freedom fighters, the Congress House which is an enclave of seven buildings is literally surrounded by a mujra complex. Its only sightings with History are the names of the buildings like Sarojini Sadan, Dadabhai Manzil, Jinnah Hall, Congress Restaurant and Beer Bar.
In 1972, Mrs Indira Gandhi the then Prime Minister had set up a Sangeet Academy at Congress House. The Academy was home to members of the Agra community of singers and dancers who organised dance shows for the royals over 300 years ago.
I am sure she did not realise what it was going to be like today. Since the Sangeet Academy is located close to Congress House and because the National party's activities are now dysfunctional, Sangeet Academy has become synonymous to the Congress House.
Arzai also tells me that partymen at the Congress House were fond of song and dance (naach-gaana). So, after their days work, a mujra session would usually be called for late in the night... and women would sing and dance to the tunes of tablas and harmoniums. This is how the place went on to become a mujra complex and also flourished with time.
The ambience of a mujra performance is usually unique in itself. It has mirrored walls, huge chandeliers and brightly lit rooms that are filled with drinkers, who splurge money on girls. Well-depicted in movies, these men shower notes on the girls or gift them with garlands of notes.
Over the years the definition of Mujras has however changed, more due to the taste in music.

I attended one and it was less like a typical Mujra and more like a dance bar -this one is at the Congress House. The entrance has a old board which reads Sangeet Academy. As we enter, we have male and female gazes on us. People stare from floors above and are suspicious about the unregulars around. However, unlike Kamathipura and Falkland Road, the girls are extremely beautiful. Lustrous black hair, milk like skin and designer or expensive sarees…yes, this is not exactly the red-light, this according to Arzai is where mujras or kothas take place. The girls come from Agra, UP and Delhi.
When I attended one of the mujras sessions, the feel of the original Mujra is devastatingly tweaked. There are mirrors, tabla players, a singer and bling-bling lights….all apart but the musicians are stationery, they just sit and watch.

The music comes from blaring speakers and these pretty looking north-Indian damsels dance to the tune of Bollywood remixes. Two guests are sitting in the centre and they have in their hands several bundles of Rs 10 notes.
One of the guests tries his best to get hold of the girl or touch her, but all that he can do is pat her on the waist. He pats her twice on her waist and then gets no more of it. According to Arzai they don’t sleep for a pittance. Each of them make a maximum of Rs 50,000 per day, only by dancing and...wow, I say. The girls remain confined to their homes during the day and only work at night. Their day begins at around 3pm and goes on till 4 am.
Incidentally, they don’t work as prostitutes but naachne wallis instead. If they sleep, it is for the master who feeds them enough so that they don’t shift loyalties. Once they are his, the are salaried.
I move out in 10 minutes. It is not the best performance, but the thumkas, jhatkas and eye expressions can be a treat for any man, both inviting and sensual.
Well, this is some slice. One dark, one light, one monetarily exhausting and the other financially tempting…This is a slice of “red-light” Mumbai


Pic: Courtesy The New York Times

Wednesday 13 May 2009

Cartoons that were idiotically boxed in my childhood

Eight years...uhhh...seven..hmm six... no, I think eight is right.
Yes, its been eight years since I sat animatedly to watch cartoons that ran on my idiot box. I must have been 14 and yet I was still obsessed with Tom and Jerry, Flintstones, Jetsons, Scooby Doo. Today, I realise that age is getting on me (22 being close on heals), I try best switch my remote — err..before a midlife crisis — to the POGOs or Cartoon Networks of our times from my daily Sitcoms and news trash, but, to my dissapointment all I get to see is some Japanese cartoons (Shing-chang, Pokemon, Doremon and all that jazz), which I personally feel is NON-SENSICAL TRASH dumped to a lull group of X-BOX and Play-station obsessed kids.

Yes, I do miss some of my favourite cartoons and am sad that none of it is being fed to the present generation and beyond. And so, this overtly magnanimous ego of mine...deflates...refuses to switch to cartoon channels for now, but instead opts for the better option to vent my cartoon woes...Ah...well you know...MY BLOG...My beshtest friend...
So here it goes, the list of my favourite cartoons that were idiotically boxed in my childhood (in no lovable order)


DUCKTALES




Uncle Scrooge McDuck and his three great-nephews Dewey, Huey, Louie were the most loved foursome among my friend circle. We used to love the cartoon to the core and most of my girl and boy friends would specially drop by to my house daily, only to catch up with the next episode together.
The most fascinating element in this Walt Disney production was the GOLD ELEMENT..yes..wait I am getting there... I loved watching Uncle Scrooge swim in his "gold coin-pool" hidden in the circular round locker inside his dollar-signed office building.
Scrooge was probably the richest duck in town, but woah, the greedy uncle wanted more, so the cartoon script was a twist from the Bollywood one-liner... A total paisa dekh tamasha dekh (original being Paisa phek tamasha dekh).
Well, most of the times, the episodes were all about shielding Uncle Scrooge's wealth from the Beagle Boys and the devilishly beautiful Magica De Spell. It was an out an out chase for the "big-bucks".
Uncle Scrooge, who hated his naughty little great-nephews in the begining of every episode and constantly cursed his nephew Donald for making him their foster parent, virtually made them participants in his "save my money game." So, in the end they were one big happy family, saving us kids aka my friends a beautiful smile.

SCOOBY DOO



Scooby doobie Doo WHERE ARE YOU? You got some work to do now.... hmm...I can still sing the song for you. I have fond memories of this cartoon in particular, especially because it was one of mine and my brother Saby's most loved cartoons. We were one of the biggest fans around, probably because its eerie feel and prudish spookiness and the silly ghost-busting brigade i.e. Shaggie and Scooby Doo followed by Freddie (who was always on the driver's seat in the Dream Machine car), the hottie Daphine and Velma (intelligent, smart and daring of the lot), excited our ghostly sensibilities.
I remember Saby play Freddie and me Welma, to add to the romantic touch, my brother's pupply-love would play Daphine. We would re-run the entire show daily after watching it, that was the extent of our craze. It was fun, how we would keep guessing who the real ghost was till the end of the cartoon, though often it was more than obvious. Yes, but Scooby Doo had a standard story line which would end by unmasking the mysterious ghost.
The most adorable characters of them all were Shaggie and Scooby Doo the hungriest of the lot. They would salivate on burgers and ice-creams and the scooby snack ofcourse.
The "Dream Machine" gang would only have to feed scooby snacks to Shaggy and Scooby Doo to persuade them to disguise and confront the ghost face to face.
Somewhere in between we also had Scooby's nephew Scrappy Doo but well he did not fit the bill or for that matter the "Dream Machine team".
This Hanna Barbera production was such a big hit, that the cartoon was followed by two Hollywood movies, one a sequel to the other. There have been several versions of the Scooby Doo cartoon ever since...but none could beat the original. Interestingly, the original run was in 1969, i.e. over FOUR decades ago, but good cartoons die-hard and so has Scooby Doooo..

CAPTAIN PLANET



"With your powers combined, I, am Captain Planet?" Yes, Captain Planet...this is the only action cartoon I never had qualms about watching with the boys. The script goes like this....five ordinary people are gifted with the rings of elemental power Wind, Water, Earth, Fire, Heart by the Earthy Spirit Gaia. These five come from different parts of the world and unite to form the "Planateers" who have been destined to Save Planet Earth.
Individually, their Earthly energies helps keep away the enemy from harming the environment, but, when the enemy overpowers, they combine their energies by placing their rings forward and calling out to our very own CAPTAIN PLANET. And as the song goes, Captain Planet...He's the hero, gonna bring pollution down to zero. However, Captain Planet is weakened when he comes in direct contact with pollutants.
The beautiful Earth Spirit Gaia protects these planateers and regularly briefs them on the next environment-protection assignment while also informing them about the doers of such crime.
Gaia is my favourite, because she was absolutely mystical. The best part about this Ted-Tuner production was that it was fun yet informative at the same time. It helped young kids like me become more environmentally concious.
Yes....The Power is Yours....

TOM AND JERRY



Tom and Jerry nahin dekha to kya dekha. Yes, this cartoon cannot "just" skip your mind. Originally created by William Hanna and Joesph Barbera for MGM Productions, Tom and Jerry is the story of a blue-grey housecat (Tom) and a brown mouse (Jerry). Supposedly living under one roof, Tom and Jerry replicate the real-life enemity between mice and cats. But what it offers, is out and out non-sensical, hysterical, power-packed comical violence dramatically toned with endless battles and chases. The mouse triggers, the cat is triggered and the never-ending chase continues...unfortunately poor Tom never manages to catch the menacing Jerry. In one or two of the cartoons they patch up and vow friendship only to become fierce enemies in the next. Interestingly, Tom also dies is more than three of the cartoon shows, but, again, he never really dies, he comes back to haunt lil Jerry.
All cartoons however run high and dry without other characters who help make it big, Spike (the bulldog) and his sone Tyke, Quacker, Mammy two shoes (the African American housemaid - known for kicking Tom out of home often), Nibbles (the little orphan mouse), the gold-fish are some of these.
My favourite cartoon from among the series is The Night before Christmas.
I AM A LUCKY ONE THOUGH, I don't need cartoon channels to view re-runs, I have my prized Tom and Jerry video cassette-collection, which I turn to whenever I need to lift my mood. And don't be suprised....the first Tom and Jerry Cartoon was screened in 1940...and the series alone have one seven Academy awards. So, you know that no one outgrows watching the cartoon, and no other cartoon has been able to beat the Cat-Mouse duo.

OK... I LOVED MANY MORE, BUT THESE WERE FOUR OF MY FAVOURITE. I have decided to pen only this much before you get bored any further. But, I cannot do without mentioning them, so here it is
Johnny Quest, Flintstones, Richie Rich, The Jetsons, Tale Spin, Swat Cats, Alladin, The Little Mermaid, Pink Panther, Popeye, The Perils of Penelope Pistop, Top Cat, Cat Dog, Courage the Cowardly Dog... I think this should suffice, Poor little kiddies are missing so much these days







Thursday 7 May 2009

STILL HOPEFUL

It was my first oppurtunity as a voter, I was excited that I would no longer be a mute spectator but a participant in the government making process. The whole "responsibility-towards-the-Nation" thing had seeped into me to such an extent that I personally went an applied for mine and four of my other family members' names in the electoral list early in August 2008. I wrote about exercising voting rights in my blog, in magazines, in the newspaper I work etc. My cousins mocked at my excitement and found my reasons to vote very lame.
However, somewhere post the attacks the energy of participation dwindled. I did not want to preach, i did not want to ridicule, I did not want to act...I simply did not want to do anything. I was neither an optimist nor a pessimist, I simply did not want to do anything.
Come elections, working in the news room did some good to me. The daily reports from our political reporters, editing those copies and news packages gave me a brief idea on whom to vote and not to. But since I simply did not want to do anything, i did not bother to check if my name had come in the electoral list...instead I moved on... speaking to friends on the poor state of political affairs in the state, the wannabe PMs, the daily menacing smses from PRs of political parties.
"What a sham," I thought.
To add to this, Congress MP' Milind Deora was standing from my constituency. What a sham again? My family has been a Congress supporter for decades now, but, hey, Deora's "indispensable work" as he claims in the last 5 years did nothing to magnetise me. I did not wantto vote him.
But somewhere, the feeling of parting with responsibility was making me guilt laden.
again but I wanted the Congress, less because of my family ties and more because i wanted Dr Manmohan Singh.
Unlike Advani, he may not seem to be a "desperate seeker of power" but his sombre approach to accusations from the Opposition is electrifying. I agree that during Singh's reign security has been at loose ends, but I also know that if we have the BJP worse is expected. Despite BJP's Hindutava agenda, Godhra and Babri Masji as track record big corporates still vouch for BJP... Again such a sham?
However, I was a little let down by Congress' very poor weapon to attack their OPPOSITION...that is "Kandahar". The Congress should have realised that every government has its own set of problems to tackle. If BJP had Kandahar, then the Congress had 7/11, 26/11, Jaipur, Hyderabad, Bengaluru, Delhi serial blasts and more. If BJP released a terrorist, Congress failed to tackle the terrorist...By digging up Kandahar to counter-attack their "failed to act on terror" flaws, Congress did not only behave prudishly but also dissapointed several of its voters....who were expecting some strong war of words...and war politics...perhaps they could have spoken of how Manmohan Singh's government tackled the Global Recession. That was a remarkable feat...
Unfortunately, India for the last decade or so has been sitting on the lap of uncertainity. And the government is not doing better any to reassert this claim.
Sometimes I strongly feel that I want Manmohan Singh more because I don't want BJP to come to power. So I voted for Milind and so I want Singh badly. But I am still hopeful that Congress realises its flaws and works on core issues that are affect the nation instead of building allies outside the country. I voted....I voted because I am STILL HOPEFUL




Sunday 3 May 2009

And it was good

The romantics made rose of it,
The little-jewels made gold of it,
The flirts made a mock of it,
The animals made hunger of it,
The cartoonists made potrayals of it,
The psychos made craze of it,
The strong made weak of it,
The haters made venom of it,
The drinkers made relief of it,
The instruments made music of it,
The foodies made taste of it,
The doctor made treatment of it,
The scientist made subject of it,
And This girl made love of it...
And it was good

Monday 20 April 2009

WHY I ALWAYS LOVED PLAYING FOR WEDDINGS?

As a child, I always felt that I was deprived of a fair share of weddings.
For someone who grew up seeing her parents wedding cassette almost every week, reel life weddings were almost an aberration from the real ones.
I saw weddings in movies, in photo albums, on television....well almost everywhere.
However, since my family lived in Muscat, far from home... I did not get to see a single wedding until I was 11. And probably at the time, I was anxiously waiting to be part of a Catholic wedding. Then, finally one day i got to see my first catholic wedding. I was part of the Children's choir in Church and the couple wanted us to sing.I remember sitting for the practices, my choir trainer was teaching us this beautiful hymn called, "Set me like a seal"...it was a solo and the moment I heard the song I hoped that she'd invite me to sing a solo for her.
The next day while we were practising, she asked those interested in singing the song to come forward. For the first time in my life, I took some courage to raise my hand.
What followed was beautiful... I got to sing that song from one wedding to the other. So much so that when I came to Mumbai, and started training with this small youth choir...I taught them the song too.
The most beautiful part of Christian weddings has always been the choir, the music and the energy which helps brings two people in unision.
Now, after singing for over 15 weddings and playing the keyboard for over eight weddings... I have always wondered how many more in the kitty
Another interesting thing about my life is that everytime, I hear a good piece of music... I keep it aside...probably wondering if I can use it for my own and then another wedding party approaches and I push the piece ahead so that theirs only becomes special.

Because what keeps my love for weddings alive is the aile, the wedding couple, the bride shimmering in white, the congregation, the instruments, the music and the wedding choir.
I recently played for a wedding of two couples and I think the choir was just close to perfection...and yes, Set me like a seal..was still one of my favourite hymns there

Sunday 22 February 2009

FIFTEEN THINGS YOU DIDN'T KNOW ABOUT ME

1) I love to clean my house... I honestly think I am a reincarnation of some Kantabai or Kamlibai. I hate dirty rooms and really get irritated when I see untidy people. Unfortunately, I am surrounded by them 24X7 and there is nothing I can do about it. Cleaning your cupboard, doing your bedding and washing utensils are some of the best de-stressors. They actually help you tidy up the brain. But yes... I have never tried my cleaning antics in the toilets... I leave that for other people. So, on a really good day if I am doing nothing I take a cloth and begin dusting....Gosh, what a de-stressor??

2) I love drinking coffee... During my exams I had this bad habit of having four mugs of coffee daily. One even before brushing my teeth, second after brushing my teeth. The other post lunch and one more post dinner. It honestly never kept me awake but i always felt it did wonders to my brain. Yes but i am not an addict, I quit coffee many a times only to return to it when I am really depressed or think that my brain needs some more greasing.

3) I think men who flirt are really uncool... Well, my friends think they are CHARMINGGGGGGGG... well, they might just be. But a man should try the next best thing to woo a women. Its another thing that men have always thought twice before flirting with me coz of my don't-bother-too-hard attitude. The thing is that its rare that a man uses his intelligence prowess to make a woman go weak in her knees...wonder why? And even if they do, they are not better than the ones who flirt. GOSH!! I think i hate men.

4) I am generally grumpy...Ok! I know it is a very bad habit, but i frown more often than i smile. I get up with a frown, i sleep with a frown, i work with a frown and blah blah blah! Its another thing that I think i look great when i smile and people often tell me to do that...since it makes me look more pleasant. Yes and whenever I do manage to smile I am framed for life and then I happily put up these pictures on Orkut, Facebook and on chat rooms as my display picture. Ahaan!! but the one on my blog is not at all deceptive. Note: Look at the picture carefully...its the grumpy me. Keep Smiling and try hard to keep making me smile :)))

5) I love chocolates but will never buy them... This is a big problem with stingy people like me...oops i forgot to mention how stingy i am...probably it will mention it in the next pointer. My favourite is Galaxy...hmmmmmmmm...man that chocolate makes me go tizzy...don't get it in India though. It would be over my dead body if i had to part with my chocolates...sometimes I do...but only for my brothers. Yes, but i wont go all the way to buy myself a chocolate. All the chocolates i have eaten till date have been gifted...however, I do buy myself Rs 5 worth Dairy Milk or Five star chocolates at times. Oh! I forgot, I also have this fettish for five star...if I remember when I was in school I would distribute big bars of five star chocolates to my classmates. I think I shifted to toffee distribution just when i felt that my classmates were expecting a lil too much.

6) I am really stingy... This word is an understatement. In college i did not go beyond a Rs 4 vadapav and now while i earn I think 10 times before buying something. And even if I do buy something I crib about how much money I possibly spent simply buying it when there were better options. Same goes to eating, I dont think i could possibly spend much on food. I know how guilty i feel if my bill exceed Rs 200....yeah i know I am bad at this.

7) I love my family and have a best friend called Tess...I know everyone gives the same old jazz. But i cannot live without dad, mom and my naughty lil brothers. We all fight and we fight really bad at times...but in the end we are just one big family. And though the "I-love-my-family-thing" stands on the top of my priority list, i thought i should include it somewhere in the end so that it does not bore people.
MY best friend TESS: Yes, this was the only place where i never mentioned her. If a person knows me, she/he has to know Tess. Not that its a must and all...its just that she loves poking in everytime. So, if I get a friend callin me after ages, the first or for that matter the last think they ask me is, "Oh! So how is Tess?" Ok guys, I know she has these cute lil name TESS and all...and I know that you know that she is my best friend...but did I ever ask you to mention her name so often. Won't deny that she is adorable...like an older sister, who tries hard to make me smile, showers me with chocolates and also reminds me that I need a Prince Charming in my life...but blah blah...sometimes she just goes overboard and tries to drill names of some guys into my head. She is crazy, I tell you and she makes me feel like a dim wit at times coz she is really good with men and words...I am not...even if I am...i refuse to entertain it when unecessary. But Tess I really love you and you are like family to me

8) I never had a fling and have had only 3 crushes till date... ;( Ok I am not indulging in Name Droping...it wouldn't interest you anyway, until and unless you are assuming that you among the three...don't bother....these 3 guys dont know head or tail of my blog. I know its sad to have only had 3 crushes but its very rare for me to like someone. I have had my set of infatuations like "Oh my God!! that guy is really hot" but couldn't really categorise them as crushes.
I had my last crush like two years ago and the one before that five years ago and the other like seven years ago. Blaah...they all reside in different cities today... and thats just about it....I really dont care about these crush feelings anymore. And until and unless you still feel you are among the three...you are happy to feel so...no harm

9) I make my expressions clear with the eye...If i can't look at you in the eye and talk to you then there is something terribly wrong with you. Either, I think you are just too boring or that you are just making me feel very uncomfortable for reasons I do not know.
If I look at you in the eye and talk to you, like a proper stare, then I really hate you from the core of my heart. If I look at you casually, then you don't have to bother...you are my loving friend and I really love you.

10) I inadvertently use a lot of pink daily: Honestly, I am not a pink person and neither do I feel that it looks good on dark skin. My favourite colours are "black and white"...possibly cause that is the story of my life at present. But, yes getting back to the point.... I have a lot of pink... pink soap, pink shampoo, pink towel, pink scrunchie, pink homewear, pink perfume (Colour ME - Milton and Loyd).... also my room walls are painted in pale pink. Pink... tooooo much :)

11) I've had several pet names: The most popular being Baby Darling. Till I was eight everyone called me with the name...later, when I was no longer fit for one I got names following "their love" and "my size" .... like janu, jaan, jaanu, janey, jen, moti, battu, batati (potato)....

12) My close circle of friends: I have a group of close friends... who i remember in both my happy and sad times and I love them all to the core. Yes, I have had my share of misunderstandings and fights with them, but the fact is that they bring a smile on my face. Most of us don't talk often, but when we do, its like a house on fire...List goes (using initials for some or their nicknames)....Tesso, Nish, HZ, Sharine, Deba, Nads, Bless, Sania, Yash, Misbah, Sobs, Andy, Lisa... (basically all of em know a lot abt me)

13) I weighed 92kgs when I was 15: I thought i should keep it as a big secret for a long time. But now things are so different that I feel that I rather flaunt my once-obese-self. It just makes for an interesting read, considering the fact that I still say i didn't do a thing to loose all that baby fat.

14) I can't keep secrets about my personal life: Yeah its a truth... I can't keep secrets, half the world knows everything about me and all my stupid secrets, probably this is why I am writing such a blog too... Ahaa...but except for my best friend everyone knows the half-truth.


15) I love comments... whether good or bad... I just love getting feedback about everything in my life. So you know what you have to do next :)
Keep smiling and keep dreaming
JANE BORGES



Monday 26 January 2009

The Tea Couple




“Few animals make a living the way I do. I stand outside my balcony, seeing my small world begin and end everyday right in front of my eyes,” Srinath reasoned with his wife Shradha, who constantly grumbled about his inactivity.
The couple had been living on the third floor of the D’Cunha Mansion for 35 years.
Srinath, a 68-year-old retired Army official spent most of his time in his balcony staring blankly at the society compound. His excitement tripled when he saw young children from D’Cunha come down to play.
He’d ask them to play games and offer to keep score. Srinath loved badminton and volley, so in order to get the children play his favourite sport he would also announce a prize for the winning team. The winning participants would be showered with candies, biscuits and Swiss chocolates that his son would send for him from the U.K. This, however, did not go well with Shradha.
Forty years ago, the couple had married amid strong resistance from the family. Shradha was a Marwari from Rajasthan and six-years-older than Srinath, a Tamilian from a family of academicians. Srinath was only eighteen and was pursuing an engineering degree in Bombay when he met Shradha, his classmate and best friend Shrimanker’s sister. She would teasingly call him Sri.
Little did Shradha know that the tea serving business at Shrimanker’s study table where Sri came to study daily would soon evolve into love?
They were young and passionate about their feelings. All they had to do was run because blessings from family were next to impossible.
Forty years later, Sri was still playing the runaway groom while Shradha at 74, saw old age catching up really soon. “You should stop wasting your time and money on those children?” she would say. “You get up at 7 am and directly go to the balcony with a pen and paper, anxiously waiting to keep score, whereas, the kids only come at 5 in the evening. Spend some time with me instead,” Shradha protested.
However, he found solace in earth. The brown of the compound soothed his unoccupied mind. Everyday as he saw Shradha leave to buy vegetables from the market, he would scream from the balcony, “Buy four packets of Parle G biscuits and if possible get few Melody chocolates too.” Shradha was tired and fed up. Her only son Dinesh lived continents away and even Shrimanker, had stopped frequenting her place because he found it difficult to walk up the building stairs.
One day, agitated with her husband’s worrisome behaviour, Shradha, while serving tea to him in the balcony, asked, “When will you die Sri? I’ve had enough of you” He looked at her and smiled, “Whenever you say dear? I have always listened to you.” Adding, “You wanted me to run, I did, you wanted me to marry you, I did, now, if you want me to die, I will.”
Shradha, laughed saying, “It is not that easy…trust me.” Sri who was eating his breakfast, a bowl of upama while rocking on his balcony chair, simply said, “You have a bad memory, Shradu.”
Shradha did not understand, however, feeling guilty of having asked him such a question, she let it all run down as a joke.
That evening Srinath did not stand outside to watch the kids play. The children played half-heartedly, throwing occasional glances at the balcony, expecting Srinath Uncle to shower them with goodies. As it grew darker, their hopes for sweeteners also melted away and the dust laden compound grew silent again.
Srinath had decided to be with his wife that day. The old couple spent hours together on bed reminiscing their early days of married life, their struggle for acceptance by family, Srinath’s sudden decision to join the Army and the last of his successes in the Bangladesh war of 1971. “It all seems like yesterday, I miss those times, I miss the real you. That strong Sri who would give me everything I wanted without second thoughts,” Shradha whispered in his ear. Srinath smiled again saying, “I am still the same man…see I am spending so much time with you now, I won’t deny you anything.” Then, he shared a secret that he had locked within himself for years. “You know… you make amazing tea, it has magic. I still cannot forget that ginger tea you would make for Shrimankar and me when I used to come to collect notes. Your tea and your wishes go hand in hand,” he said sheepishly like a 16-year-old who was revealing his first crush.
Shradha blushed. Probably, he had finally realised how badly she wanted him now. I have finally got my Sri back…she thought. They had spent the whole day just lying beside each other, not knowing how time had flied.
The next day, when Shradha got up, she wasn’t surprised when she did not find him on bed. Seeing him lie asleep on the rocking chair again…she felt disappointed and moved to the kitchen to make him the ginger tea he spoke about the last night.
Unfortunately, his lips never moved to sip it again. She tried waking him up but failed. Her senses went dry when she realised that Sri had only obliged to her request. She brushed on her memory…that she had forgotten and...
Your tea and your wishes go hand in hand…is all that she could remember.
It was over a cup of tea that she had told him that she wanted to marry him. It was over tea that she had asked him if he was ready to run away with her and it was over tea that she asked him when he would die. He couldn’t have possibly refused…


Epilogue

A month after Srinath’s death, Shradha Rajan rocked in the same chair, sipping a cup of tea. A pen and paper, a packet of biscuits and melody chocolates lay beside the tea kettle. Now, she keeps score...

Tuesday 20 January 2009

DON'T BUILD INDIA ON SPECULATIONS



Every time we Indians create history, the world shifts their eye-view towards us. Sometimes, even before we make history we win adulation. For instance, A.R. Rahman's recent win at the Golden Globe's for the background score in Danny Boyle's film Slumdog Millionaire has only led to rumors on "Rahman to be first-Indian to win an Oscar." I call this "speculative history…" a history that is written even before it occurs. It is interesting to learn how we Indians live on speculations. We predict our tomorrow and if our predictions don't hit the right key, we also evade it as soon as possible. A week back, my cousin laughed at me while I was watching the Jaago Re campaign online. (Jaago Re campaign is an attempt to get the youth apply for election cards so that they can vote in the forthcoming elections.) I asked why and he confidently said…our vote won't make a difference. Well…there goes another speculation. Honestly, I have learnt few lessons the hard way and one of the greatest I have learnt is to keep no room for speculation because it is just another approach to being lax. A speculation is like a coil…the harder you press (more the speculation) the greater will be the force with which it will recoil. Media reports revealed how the 26/11 terror attacks could have been avoided if not for the lax attitude of the government towards coastal security…again government speculation of such Intelligence reports being fake proved fatal. As the country is on the brim of another Republic Day celebration, it is our duty as youth to push for greater accountability in governance. If we ourselves live speculative lives how can we look forward? The Republic Day is the celebration of the birthday of India's Bible, "Our Constitution." The Constitution comprises the rights we enjoy, our fundamental duties and obligations as citizens of the Nation. If we don't abide by it and consider its guidelines as a constitutional joke, we are in a way committing a sin against the National Order. If you go to think about it, just like the Catholic Bible our Constitution helps make better and civilized citizens…but unfortunately we never take it seriously.
Interestingly, a recent media report highlights an effort by Fight Back— a Mumbai based movement in this direction. The movement which has registered 50-schools in India will get students read the fundamental rights enshrined in our Constitution during the Republic Day celebrations. Its important for us to go-ahead and take the plunge…so while we love networking on Facebook, Hi5, Orkut, it would do no harm to at least read about campaigns like Jaago Re and Fight-back. Even if our effort makes a small difference…we can proudly say we tried. So log on to
www.jaagore.com or www.fight-back.net and see how you can help.The Republic Day is not just another National holiday it is about making a difference. Don't ponder and speculate and you will find the answer to everything including world peace…. Happy Republic and World Peace Day!!! Jai Ho… as Rahman put it in his award winning composition.